Views

Lessons in mythology: Father's Day can be complicated

Details

Tuesday, 17 June 2025

Written by Pitt Dickey

Father’s Day has just passed us by. Late being better than never, here is a belated salute to Father’s Day as celebrated by our old buddy Oedipus in Greek mythology land. If you think your family constellation is convoluted, you got nuthin’ on Oedipus. Kindly read this to realize your own family situation ain’t so bad. Consider Leo Tolstoy’s observation in Anna Karenina: “All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.” Oedipus’s unhappy family was unhappiness on an alleged Elon Musk-like cocktail of Ketamine, ecstasy, magic mushrooms, LSD, and cocaine. Let us begin.
Oedipus was born to King Laius and Queen Jocasta of Thebes. After long term infertility, Laius went to the Oracle at Delphi for help. The Oracle told Laius disturbing news that if he had a son, his son would kill him. Nonetheless, the Queen soon gets into a family way, giving birth to Oedipus. Laius, uninterested in being killed by his son, decided offing the kid was the best plan.
He pierced the infant Oedipus’ ankles, binding them together to prevent Oedipus from crawling away. He ordered one of his lackeys to leave Oedipus on a mountain to die. The Lackey felt sorry for Oedipus, giving him to a shepherd. The shepherd ultimately gave Oedipus to the childless King Polybus and Queen Merope of Corinth who raised Oedipus as their own child.
Years later, Oedipus ran across a drunk who told him that he was adopted. Oedipus confronted Polybus and Merope but they denied adopting him. Oedipus smelled a rat. He went to the Oracle at Delphi for counseling. The Oracle told him that he would murder his father and marry his mother. This news freaked Oedipus out. He decided not to return home, but go to Thebes instead. On the way there, Oedipus got into the first recorded road rage incident when he came to an intersection where his biological father Laius was riding in a chariot. They got into a fuss over who had the right of way which resulted in a fight in which Oedipus killed his father.
Oedipus resumed his trip to Thebes but was stopped by a Sphinx blocking the road. The Sphinx stopped all travelers to ask them a riddle. If the traveler couldn’t answer it, the Sphinx would kill and eat him. The riddle was: “What walks on four feet in the morning, two in the afternoon, and three at night?” Oedipus answered: “Man: as an infant he crawls on all fours, as an adult he walks on two legs, and in old age he uses a walking stick.” No one had ever answered her riddle before. The Sphinx was so upset she leaped off a cliff and killed herself.
When Oedipus got to Thebes, he learned that Creon, the brother of Queen Jocasta had announced that anyone who killed the Sphinx would be made King of Thebes and marry the widowed Queen Jocasta. Oedipus, who did not know they were related, married his Mom. They produced four children together. After some years, a plague came to Thebes. Oedipus summoned Tiresias the blind prophet. He learned the plague would not end until the murderer of King Laius was found. Oedipus got extremely angry. You would not like him when he is angry. To calm him down, Jocasta told him the story of how her first child had supposedly died. Oedipus got an uneasy feeling because he knew that he had killed Laius. He got even queasier thinking about the prophecy. Like Saul on the road to Damascus, Jocasta suddenly realized Oedipus was her son. Bummed out by this knowledge, Jocasta hung herself.
Oedipus bumped into the same shepherd who had saved him as an infant. The shepherd told him the whole sordid story. He realized the prophecy had come true, and he killed his father and married his mother. Oedipus freaked out and went looking for his wife/mother. He discovered she had hung herself. He was so distraught that he took a pin from a brooch she was wearing and blinded himself. He spent the rest of his unhappy life as a blind man wandering the country guided by his daughter/half sister Antigone. Whew. What a mess.
Don’t you feel better now about your own family situation in comparison to Oedipus? Life is not so bad, eh? Paraphrasing Julie Andrews: “A spoonful of misery for someone else/ Makes the medicine go down/ In the most delightful way.” Or to sum up Oedipus and his Mom’s relationship, as John Sebastian of the Loving Spoonful once sang in a different context: “You didn’t have to be so nice/ I would have liked you anyway.” Author’s Note: No Sphinxes or Sigmund Freud were harmed in writing this column.

(Illustration by Pitt Dickey)

Mama, Dada, Baby makes three—or more

Details

Tuesday, 10 June 2025

Written by Margaret Dickson

If you are an American of childbearing age, Vice President JD Vance wants you to have a baby—and NOW! What’s more, he wants mom or dad, though most likely mom, to stay home with babies and young children. This is from a man who ran for public office on a ticket of getting big government out of Americans’ personal lives, and having a baby and raising a family is about as personal as it gets.
That said, Vance is far from alone in his concern about our nation’s declining birth rate and spouting ideas of what to do about it. The National Center for Disease Control, the CDC, reports that our birth rate has dropped steadily since the baby-booming 1950s, accelerating downward with the financial crisis of 2007-08, and reaching its lowest point ever in 2023 at 1.6 children for American women of childbearing age. The base population replacement level is considered 2.1 children per mother.
In blunt terms, the US population now has a shrinking fertility rate.
It could be worse.
South Korea holds the title for the fewest children born in any country, with a fertility rate of 0.72 per childbearing woman. Korean schools, now empty, are being repurposed for seniors. Other Asian nations, as well as European countries, face growing crises as well. Nations with the highest fertility rates are in Africa.
Population experts say the causes of falling birth rates are many and vary from nation to nation. These include delayed marriage and childbirth, high cost of living and high stress in work cultures, changing social values, gender inequity, and aging populations which put more financial and emotional stress on younger people.
I don’t know about you, but I see young people around me facing all these hurdles.
Vance and the so-called “natalist” movement believe that having large families benefits society and ultimately allows the human race to continue. Maybe so, but how to convince people of child-bearing age in our country and elsewhere to get to work creating more and larger families?
As far as I can tell, Vance and others have some ideas, though no universal agreement about them. Most of those ideas involve my tax dollars and yours. They include paid parental leave, increasing child tax credits, paying parents to stay home to care for preschoolers, paying relatives, likely grandma, to provide child care, lowering day care standards to make it more affordable, lower-cost housing, and the list goes on and on.
Note that Vance and other pro-natalists rarely mention who is going to pay for all this, and certainly do not mention the American taxpayer.
As the mother of three and grandmother of two, I know firsthand and now watch how difficult it is to raise children in today’s economy. Daycare now averages over $11,000 annually per child and is higher in more urban areas. Most families have two working parents, with less than a quarter of children having a stay-at-home mom and a mere 1 percent with a stay-at-home dad.
If I could wave my magic wand over this situation, I would make it so every family could choose what sort of family situation works best for them, regardless of cost, but that is a fantasy, of course.
In the meantime, I will pay no attention to Vance and the pro-natalists until they quit “setting the table” about what the problem is and realistically address what it will take to make raising a family something Americans not only want to do but can afford to do.

Publisher's Pen: Eastover Community “Shines” for Sullivan

Details

Tuesday, 17 June 2025

Written by Bill Bowman

At Up & Coming Weekly, we have always appreciated and admired Fayetteville/Cumberland County’s remarkable capacity to show passionate, compassionate, and empathic support to its residents, businesses, and non-profit organizations.
This home-spun collaborative spirit is characterized by a local willingness to address the challenging needs and issues of the community that define our identity and ultimately strengthen our community. I am continually inspired by the many unsung heroes in Fayetteville and Cumberland County, people who generously dedicate their time, talents, and resources to making our community not only livable, but lovable.
For 29 years, Up & Coming Weekly newspaper has been privileged to share local stories and to cover major events that reflect our community's brand. We are consistently guided by our readers' invaluable insights, which have led us to countless stories of controversy, compassion, significant achievements, and noteworthy accomplishments. Learning and listening to what is important to our readers has kept us relevant to the community and has never steered us in the wrong direction.
A recent and compelling example of this spirit is the Eastover community's initiative on behalf of Sullivan Brooke Smith. At one year old, Sullivan is bravely facing a rare and severe form of epilepsy, which necessitates extensive hospital treatments and tests. However, despite these challenges, Sullivan's spirit remains remarkably bright, joyful, and resilient. She is an amazing little girl!
In a display of compassion and solidarity, residents of the Eastover community have rallied to support the Smith family with prayers, love, and unwavering assurance that they are not alone in their fight for Sullivan's recovery. This collective community effort has led to the creation of the "Shine for Sullivan" event dedicated to supporting Sullivan and her family.
The "Shine for Sullivan" will take place at Eastover Ball Park on June 21 and will feature a variety of fun, family-friendly activities designed to engage the community and raise much-needed funds for the Smith family. They will have something on hand for everyone, including a Walkathon, a Pickleball Tournament, and a Bake Sale. We encourage Up & Coming Weekly readers to learn more about the event and Sullivan's medical journey by visiting www.shineforsullivan.com.
Every individual involved, every planned activity, and every dollar raised through Eastover's community support will undoubtedly uplift Sullivan and alleviate the burdens faced by the Smith family. This initiative stands as a powerful testament to how a community comes together to embrace and assist a neighbor confronting significant challenges. This embodies the essence of the Fayetteville/Cumberland County community, and it is precisely what our local newspaper is committed to showcasing.
We look forward to seeing you in Eastover on June 21. Thank you for reading Up & Coming Weekly community newspaper.

(Photo: Photo of Sullivan courtesy of www.shineforsullivan.com)

Letter to the Editor: A critical response to reframing narrative of “Black Fatigue”

Details

Tuesday, 10 June 2025

Written by Han Lheem

The concept of Black fatigue, as originally articulated, referred to the profound and chronic stress experienced by Black Americans as a result of systemic racism and enduring racial injustice. A revisionist interpretation, however, has gradually broadened the term to include the frustrations expressed by both conservative white and Black Americans in response to contemporary cultural and political narratives.
This expanded definition, advanced by voices such as J. Antoine Miner, Sr., in his article "Black Fatigue: A Call for Accountability, Not Accusation" (Up & Coming Weekly, Vol. 30, Issue 21, May 21–27, 2025, https://www.upandcomingweekly.com/views/11466-black-fatigue-a-call-for-accountability-not-accusation), warrants closer scrutiny. While these revisionist perspectives raise emotionally charged and rhetorically compelling arguments, particularly around accountability and agency, a more rigorous and balanced analysis reveals that the complex interplay of systemic injustice, cultural expression, and community responsibility must be understood as interrelated forces rather than competing ones.
First, the article critiques the persistent invocation of systemic racism to explain social challenges in Black communities, suggesting that this perspective deflects from personal responsibility.
Yet this binary, systemic critique versus personal accountability, is a false one. The two are not mutually exclusive. In fact, empirical research repeatedly shows that structural disadvantages and personal agency interact in shaping outcomes. For instance, a 2020 report by the Brookings Institution found that Black Americans are disproportionately affected by systemic inequalities, including attendance at underfunded schools, residence in economically disadvantaged areas with limited employment opportunities, and exposure to discriminatory policing practices.
These factors collectively contribute to persistent cycles of poverty and criminalization (Brookings, 2020). Ignoring these systemic conditions in favor of solely promoting “tough love” approaches misses the broader context that constrains individual choices.
Needless to say, the article’s call for community accountability is not without merit. Anecdotal and sociological evidence suggests that internal critiques have long existed within the Black community. Figures like Malcolm X, Bill Cosby (before his legal downfall), and academic scholars like John McWhorter have all raised alarms about internal cultural decay and the danger of glorifying dysfunction in music and media.
Indeed, in his 2004 NAACP speech, Cosby famously decried a “culture of disrespect,” drawing both applause and condemnation. More recently, McWhorter’s Woke Racism (2021) argues that progressive overreach has infantilized Black communities rather than empowering them. These voices reflect a real tension: how to acknowledge historical and ongoing oppression without reducing Black identity to perpetual victimhood.
Still, the framing in the article leans heavily into conservative talking points without sufficiently addressing how narratives of “Black-on-Black crime” or “absentee fathers” are often weaponized to deflect from the government’s role in perpetuating inequality.
For example, the “absentee father” trope, while a legitimate concern, is frequently misrepresented. According to a 2013 CDC study, Black fathers are statistically more involved with their children on average than fathers of other races, particularly in daily caregiving activities (CDC, 2013). While incarceration and economic instability have certainly strained Black family structures, the causes are deeply rooted in discriminatory housing, employment, and criminal justice policies.
A one-sided emphasis on personal failure obscures this broader truth.
Moreover, the piece critiques expressions of Black culture, especially in music, as glorifying ignorance or “thug life.” While some mainstream hip-hop certainly romanticizes violence or materialism, this view ignores the genre’s rich tradition of protest, resilience, and social commentary.
From Public Enemy to Kendrick Lamar, hip-hop has often served as a voice for marginalized Black youth, speaking to the very injustices that the article downplays. Blanket condemnation of such cultural expression risks silencing a vital outlet of community identity and resistance.
What the article does succeed in highlighting is a palpable frustration shared by many Black Americans, particularly those who feel politically or ideologically alienated from the mainstream civil rights discourse. This fatigue is not new.
Figures like Booker T. Washington and later Shelby Steele have long argued that moral uplift, education, and individual effort should form the backbone of Black advancement. It's important not to dismiss the renewed interest in these views among some community members, particularly as urban violence, economic disparities, and political polarization remain pressing concerns.
Still, genuine progress requires marrying personal responsibility with structural reform, rather than pitting one against the other.
In communities like Fayetteville, mentioned in the article, the answer lies in both community-driven reform and policy support. Programs that invest in youth mentorship, vocational training, and mental health resources, such as Chicago’s Becoming a Man initiative, have shown success in reducing school dropout rates and criminal activity. Such initiatives model how cultural change and structural intervention can go hand in hand.
In conclusion, Black fatigue is a real and multifaceted phenomenon. Instead of using it as a rhetorical tool to pit community accountability against systemic critique, a far more effective strategy is to embrace both. While the community must indeed take ownership of its challenges, that ownership needs to be robustly supported by policies and cultural narratives that genuinely empower, rather than shame.
True progress won't come from denying the past or assigning all blame to it. It will emerge from deeply acknowledging how history continues to shape the present and collectively committing to a future of shared responsibility.
References
Brookings Institution. (2020). Examining systemic racism in the United States. https://www.brookings.edu
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). (2013). Fathers’ involvement with their children: United States, 2006–2010. National Health Statistics Reports. https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/nhsr/nhsr071.pdf
Cosby, Bill. (2004). “The Pound Cake Speech.” https://www.blackpast.org/african-american-history/2004-bill-cosby-pound-cake-speech/
McWhorter, John. (2021). Woke racism: How a new religion has betrayed Black America. Portfolio.